Dear Annie:

I’m writing in response to “Waiting On A Friend,” the senior struggling to make friends in her retirement community. It’s true that in our stressed-out society, isolation can increase over time, especially for women.

While your response really covered what’s needed, I thought it wouldn’t hurt to add a counterpoint to one belief “Waiting” has that’s interfering with her success in building bonds: the idea of reciprocation, that it’s good manners to wait for others to reciprocate and ask her to engage in activities. It’s not that she’s wrong; the positive intentions behind such a belief make sense, for example, not wanting to be a burden to others or force a relationship. However, in a world of isolation, being the consistent initiator can make all the difference.

Rather than

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