I splurged on a new mountain bike a few days ago. It’s lean and mean, all steep angles and aggro geometry that make it look fast even standing still. And the color? A dead ringer for the lilacs that have been in a love affair with my balcony all season. Swoon.

But aside from riding it home from White Pine Touring, I haven’t had a chance to test-drive it on the trails. Every day, my friend Tim texts me: Have you ridden it yet?! How is it?! I can barely bring myself to admit it’s actually leaned against a wall in my office-slash-gear room, next to my similarly neglected gravel bike. All dressed up and nowhere to go. Just a couple of expensive pieces of exercise guilt silently judging me with their pristine tires.

I tell myself it’s work and evening plans keeping me from riding. The truth i

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