I Ate Every State Fair Sporkie in Under Two Hours

On the way to the State Fair , we almost got in a car crash. In retrospect, this feels like an omen.

You see, I was on a mission to eat all eight of this year’s Sporkies finalists – those strange, inventive, often fried, occasionally unholy creations that only the State Fair can pull off. I’d extended the invitation to the entire Milwaukee Mag staff, but the only one who came through was our digital editor, Brianna, who both pitied me and also didn’t understand what exactly she was signing up for. Editor’s Note: He’s right, I didn’t know what I was getting myself into.

And then as we drove toward the fair to complete our mission, some dude just zoomed out right in front of us at an intersection, totally ignoring the stop sign. Brakes screeching, we hurtled toward his car (which wa