Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here .

Dear Care and Feeding,

I have a 12-year-old son, “Dexter.” Today was his first day of middle school, and less than three hours after the school day began, I received a call at work informing me that Dexter had already earned himself a week’s suspension. When I heard about his behavior, I was floored—and knew exactly who to blame.

Dexter was suspended because he grabbed the breasts of a female classmate and told her she would “make a good tradwife.” Upon questioning him about where in the living hell he learned this from, I found out that he has been mired in the manosphere all summer during the days when he was at his dad’s place (we’re divorced).

I’ve taken away his in

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