Hey God, so look… Remember that one time You flooded the entire earth?

Yeah, of course You do. Right. Sorry.

Well, You know how You promised never to do it after that?

Again, I know You remember that, but I was just thinking… I get that it was supposed to be a one-time deal. I totally get that. It was absolutely devastating, and You promised to never do it again.

I'm not one to question Your infinite wisdom, but hear me out on this, okay? That was a long time ago. I know You gave us the rainbow as a symbol of Your promise never to do that again, but honestly, rainbows don't even mean that anymore.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is... It's okay, really. On behalf of humanity, You're off the hook.

...Not that You were ever on the hook! I mean, You're God; You can do whatever You

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