Pay Dirt is Slate’s money advice column. Have a question? Send it to Kristin and Ilyce here . (It’s anonymous!)

Dear Pay Dirt,

I have married into a family of gambling addicts. My husband’s mother, father, and the majority of his extended family are compulsive gamblers. They are constantly in debt, and many have been bankrupt multiple times. Thankfully, my husband does not gamble or have addictive behavior. His problem isn’t addiction, it’s loyalty.

He and his father are estranged because his father had only reached out when he needed money. My husband cosigned several high-interest loans for him, but when his dad stopped paying them back , my husband refused to cosign another loan. But besides his dad, he is very loyal to his family and helps them out when they ask for mon

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