GRAND VALLEY, CA - Local man Kyle Mankowski was talking on his cell phone over the weekend.

As is his habit, he got up and walked around while talking on the phone. Mankowski walked down the street, onto the highway, and all the way to the Eastern Seaboard, where he absentmindedly walked onto a cargo ship bound for Europe. After disembarking, he wandered across the continent, down toward Africa where he passed the Great Pyramid of Giza. Then, he walked across the deserts of the Middle East, miraculously dodging bullets from several rival factions.

"Yeah, anyway, if you want to go ahead with this project, I can assure you, our firm can handle your distribution needs from start to finish," he said to his client as he stepped over a landmine and began to climb the Hindu Kush mountain range

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