If tonight’s dinner plans involve Walmart’s Great Value frozen shrimp, I have some unfortunate news for you. You see, the world is a silly place right now. So, of course, the FDA has announced that you should not eat Walmart Great Value frozen shrimp.

Why? Because they are radioactive.

It’s only certain bags of frozen shrimp distributed by Indonesia’s BMS Foods that might be contaminated with Cesium-137. This radioactive isotope commonly appears at nuclear disaster sites and has a delightful ability to cause radiation sickness and death. So don’t eat the rad shrimp.

The shrimp in question was intercepted thanks to U.S. Customs and Border Protection, which detected something radioactively fishy in shipping containers at four U.S. ports. Follow-up testing confirmed Cesium-137 contaminatio

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