When bootstraps aren’t enough: How to support your child when old school methods don’t work

Many parents have heard phrases like “Pull yourself up by your bootstraps” or “Just try harder” when it comes to helping children succeed. These sayings originate from a good place, as they encourage resilience and determination.

But for many kids, especially those with neurodevelopmental differences and other mental health challenges, this approach can miss the mark. Sometimes, trying harder is not enough, and pushing children to “focus” or “behave better” can cause more harm than good.

In recent years, the world has changed in ways that deeply affect children’s development. The pandemic disrupted routines, limited social interactions, and created new challenges for young learners. Growing up surrounded by screens (tablets, phones, and computers) has also impacted children’s attention s