Harriette Cole: I was confused by what I saw on my phone, and then my girlfriend confessed

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently discovered that my girlfriend has been going through my phone when I’m not around.

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At first, I thought maybe I was imagining it, but then I noticed that some of my messages had been opened before I saw them. When I confronted her, she admitted to it and explained that she struggles with trust issues because of past relationships where she was cheated on.

She insists it has nothing to do with me personally, but I can’t help feeling hurt and violated. I’ve never given her a reason to doubt me, and I feel like trust should be the foundation of any relationship.

At the same time, I understand that past experiences can leave scars, and part of me wants to be patient and supportive while she works through her insecurities.

Still, I worry that if t