If you’ve ever gone through a breakup, you’ve likely received the brutal advice of going “no contact” with your ex. But does this rule actually help us? And if so, how?

What Is ‘No Contact’?

“No contact” is a rule many people follow post-breakup. Basically, it’s exactly as it sounds: you cut off all contact with your ex, in an attempt to get over them. That might look like muting or blocking them on social media, not responding to calls or texts, and basically pretending they’re dead to you—not to punish them, but to give yourself time away from them so you can heal.

Creating this space—both physical and emotional—from your ex-partner allows you to move on without constantly factoring them into your decisions and your future. Naturally, after a breakup, we are still wired to think about

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