Iam not perched on the edge of my seat waiting to find out who Belly eventually chooses in today's series finale of The Summer I Turned Pretty . I'm not saying I couldn't be in that position under different circumstances. It's just that I've never seen the show. Actually, that's not true. I saw the first five minutes of the first episode when it started auto-playing on Prime a couple weeks ago. Apparently, I'm an algorithmic shoo-in for the Jenny Han coming-of-age drama. Maybe I missed out on three good seasons' worth of entertainment. I'll have to learn to live with that.

Anyways . I'm writing about the show because it's pretty much my last chance, what with the finale and all. And thanks to some horological investigating by our friends at Esquire Australia —along with the good peo

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