Dear Prudence is Slate’s advice column. Submit questions here .

Dear Prudence,

I moved to a new state for retirement, and I’m trying to figure out when and how to disclose my messy personal history to new friends and dates. Right now, when new people make small talk, I say I moved here to be closer to my daughter’s family, since I’m single. This is true, but it’s not the full truth. I think this is fine for acquaintances and new friends and the first phase of dating. But as I settle in, there are now friends I’ve known for longer, and I’m wondering if I should share more with them.

If asked, I say I only have a daughter. But I actually disowned my son, “John,” when it was discovered that he was committing sex crimes against minors. My husband and I divorced over this: John priv

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