JERUSALEM — Reports circulated that the House of Solomon had fallen into disarray following a disastrous Valentine's Day celebration in which the king only bought 698 gifts despite having 700 wives.

King Solomon first became aware of his folly when assigning gift-wrapping duties to his servants.

"Oh king live forever! Behold, here are gifts totaling 698, yet 700 wives you have. Where are the other two gifts?" Adoniram the son of Abda reportedly asked.

According to sources, King Solomon rushed out of the palace to buy two last-minute gifts at a nearby gas station, only to discover that it was closed for the day. Instead, the king was forced to try passing off the error as intentional, informing three of his wives that they had to share one gift because they were the most special of all t

See Full Page