DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have different approaches to holiday gift-giving. I like to pick up nice things that I find throughout the year, with only a loose idea of who they might go to. Then I sit down in December and sort out who might like what and wrap the things accordingly.

He finds this process abhorrent and insists that the only reasonable way to choose gifts is to shop with the specific person in mind, preferably close to the time the gift is given.

The problem is, he does none of the work of actually finding those thoughtfully chosen and tailored gifts for anyone in our family. The job is left to me, and I have neither the time nor the patience to shop the way he wants me to.

Do you agree with him that I’m being thoughtless, or is it OK that I buy ahead of time as long as ev

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