This year, I find gruesome Halloween decorations are just too much to bear

first person

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In the old-timey world where I grew up, haunted houses knew their place. They put down roots and stayed in one spot, like amusement parks. People had a choice back then. You could pay admission to climb into a little car, tour the scary mansion and maybe lose your lunch along the way. Or bypass the haunted house for the Ferris wheel or Tilt-a-Whirl. If you wanted to experience terror, it was up to you to decide.

The haunted houses of yesterday have mutated into an invasive and terrifying species all over my neighbourhood. They’ve left the fun fairs and theme parks. Whether you want to or not, you can sample their horrors down the street or a