We all know someone who seems effortlessly disciplined. They wake up early, exercise without complaint, avoid doom-scrolling , and somehow always say no to the biscuits. Meanwhile the rest of us vow to change, break our resolutions by February and blame our weak willpower .

It feels like the key is willpower. Willpower is our ability to resist temptations in the moment by making an effort . Sometimes that effort is about actively holding ourselves back. Sometimes it’s about trying very hard to deny that you wanted something in the first place.

But what if our faith in willpower is actually a reason we fail?

As a behavioural scientist , I’ve been researching this question for years. The science reveals that the people who are best at self-control aren’t using more willpower

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