The raccoon had a little bit too much to drink in Virginia.

By Zak Failla From Daily Voice

Black Friday got a little wild at one Virginia liquor store — and the suspect wasn’t exactly old enough to buy booze.

Over the weekend, members of the Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter were called to the Ashland ABC Store, where they were met by a crime scene pulled straight from a movie after a raccoon sampled the merchandise before passing out cold in the bathroom, officials said.

Hanover County Animal Protection called it a “liquor-fueled rampage.”

And honestly? That feels generous.

The raccoon had a little bit too much to drink in Virginia.

The raccoon had a little bit too much to drink in Virginia.

Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter

Officer Martin responded Saturday morning and found the shelves ransacked, bottles smashed, liquor everywhere, and the suspect sprawled on the bathroom floor as if he had just discovered Fireball for the first time.

The department said the suspect — quote — was a “very intoxicated raccoon.”

Yes. Correct. A black-masked, four-pawed criminal mastermind who absolutely pre-gamed for the holidays.

Authorities said Martin “safely secured our masked bandit and transported him back to the shelter to sober up before questioning.” After a few hours of sleep and “zero signs of injury (other than maybe a hangover and poor life choices),” officials said he was released back to the wild to walk it off.

Hopefully, with a new appreciation for moderation.

"A big shout-out to Officer Martin for handling this chaotic scene with professionalism and good humor," the agency joked. "Just another day in the life at Hanover Animal Protection."