WARNING: This advice for creative government accounting is both satirical and based on real-world events.  

DISCLAIMER: See fine print regarding side effects.   

STEP ONE: BALANCE HALF THE BUDGET  

Cutting $78 billion from the budget is hard. And caucus gets whiny about cuts to pet projects.   

So, here’s a simple solution: Split the budget and only balance one side.   

Key step: Don’t tell Canadians you aren’t balancing the other side of the budget because their kids and grandkids will have to pay interest on all that extra borrowing.  

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The key ingredient is confusion. Use jargon about a “fiscal anchor” that’s based on something vague like “balancing day-to-day operating spending” by 2028.   

With luck, Canadians won’t not

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