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This is read by an automated voice. Please report any issues or inconsistencies here .

Dear Ted Sarandos,

Congratulations on making the winning bid for Warner Bros . By directly contradicting your famous “build don’t buy” mantra, you have managed to throw the already beleaguered entertainment industry into an apoplectic meltdown, and just in time for the holidays!

On the plus side, the thought of Paramount’s David Ellison throwing a nepo-baby “but I want it” tantrum when he heard the news has provided a fair amount grim delight.

Just not enough, I’m afraid, to assuage the overwhelming outrage and fear, currently being voiced by many, that you will personally not be content until every movie theater is shuttered, every other network/streaming service consumed, forc

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