No one expected this level of disrespect for tradition. Not even in America. Not even under Donald Trump. No one thought that the World Cup and FIFA would let America make a change that, to so many of us, spoils the beautiful game.

I’m talking, of course, about the formalized hydration breaks.

That’s right, for three minutes, at the 22-minute mark and 67-minute mark, every soccer game in the 2026 World Cup will stop, so that players may drink water.

But why, might you ask, in a sport that’s played even in places like the deserts of Saudi Arabia, without previous need for an established water break that long unless warranted by the heat index, will all players in all games need to stop twice for 180 seconds to stay sated?

According to FIFA, it’s to protect the men on the field. Accordin

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