ANN ARBOR, MI — Just moments after news broke that the University of Michigan had fired head football coach Sherrone Moore with cause, Secretary of State Marco Rubio had been tapped as interim coach.

"Marco, Michigan's in big trouble — really big trouble — and I've got a lot of money riding on the upcoming Cheez-It Citrus Bowl. You've got to get in there and win this thing. Everything depends on it," Trump said, interrupting a cabinet meeting to give Rubio a special assignment. "This takes top priority. I don't want you going back to the Middle East until Michigan brings home the Cheez-It Trophy."

According to sources, Rubio has an impossible job ahead of him, considering he doesn't know much about football. Rubio expressed doubt he can take the Wolverines to victory, considering his ent

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