Have grace in the holidays and beyond

In his intriguing book, “Friends Divided,” Pulitzer Prize-winning historian Gordon Wood describes the on-again, off-again, on-again friendship between Founding Fathers John Adams and Thomas Jefferson.

What stood out for me in this excellent recreation of our nation’s history was the contrast between these two great men. Adams, short and pudgy in appearance, was irascible, combative, sometimes paranoid, always sensitive about his plebian roots — his father was a farmer — and, despite his degree from Harvard and his obvious brilliance, he both “despised and envied … affluence and elegance.”

Jefferson, on the other hand, tall and handsome, came from wealth and was always the perfect and cultured gentleman. Politeness and good humor and grace meant everything to him.

These two men’s persona