In American Psycho , the film based on Bret Easton Ellis’s 1991 novel, Patrick Bateman is obsessed with his appearance. His wardrobe—curated by costume designer Isis Mussenden—is a masterclass in 1980s power dressing: Valentino and Armani suits, pale shirts, power ties. The look is pristine, clinical, and unnervingly perfect. By day, he wears it to Wall Street. At night, he’s careful not to wrinkle his clothes when he commits gruesome murders.

With news of a Luca Guadagnino remake in the works, one wonders: what would Patrick Bateman wear today? Likely still a tailored suit, with a silk tie in deep red or blue, neatly knotted and perfectly centered. The hair should be clean-cut, side-parted, slicked back with gel or pomade. The face should be smooth-shaven, the skin perfect thanks to an

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