J.D. Vance is the star of a mocking Philly mural. I went to witness its glory.

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If you Google “What should I do with $300?,” the search engine’s inescapable A.I. bot will spout corporate gobbledygook about self-improvement back at you: Open a high-yield savings account, take a class or workshop, support a charity, yada yada. But Philadelphians know that another, arguably better, option exists: Call up some pals, buy some paint, and slap a larger-than-life mural ridiculing the smarmy visage of the vice president of the United States on the side of a local institution. After all, as the Philly way dictates, who needs self-improvement when disdain is on the table?

This is how I ended up staring into the terrifying eyes of a bald, babylike J.