DEAR MISS MANNERS: At a dinner party, my companion quietly excused herself after the meal to smoke a cigarette. She went outside, over our nonsmoking hostess’s protestations that inside was fine.

As I escorted my friend outside, I heard a fellow guest, the wife of a mutual acquaintance, shriek, “What? She SMOKES?” in a tone that would have been appropriate only if my companion had excused herself to murder people or purchase heroin. I ignored it, but I felt like I should have said something.

Is this kind of behavior going to become conventionally accepted as smoking is increasingly stigmatized?

GENTLE READER: One may have health concerns for those close to you who smoke -- or for yourself, if people smoke around you -- but there are legitimate ways to express those concerns. The case

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