President-Possibly-Elect Mike Pence has set out a bold agenda for his first 100 minutes in office, should Trump be removed. The Babylon Bee's elite squadron of investigative journalists has obtained Pence's handwritten, minute by minute breakdown of his plans:
10:00 - Pardon and forgive Donald Trump. Remember scripture: "If a man attacks you, steals your tunic, incites a riot, causes supporters to call for your hanging, and makes everyone hate you... turn the other cheek." After announcing pardon, try not to enjoy watching everyone's head explode
10:08 to 10:15 - Apply hairspray
10:16 - Put casserole in oven for church potluck
10:17 to 10:30 - Send fruit baskets to all the world leaders
10:30 to 10:40 - Run from right-wing mob
10:40 to 10:50 - Run from left-wing mob
10:

The Babylon Bee

America News
Associated Press US News
Local News in D.C.
Local News in New York
The Daily Beast
Mediaite