Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here .
Dear Care and Feeding,
My husband and I have a 7-year-old daughter “Amanda” and a 3-year-old son, “Noah.” Recently, we were at my sister’s wedding, and Amanda and a few of her cousins were running about the reception while I did my best to keep an eye on Noah. When it came time for the wedding cake to be served, it was discovered that someone had carved out more than a few forkfuls. Amanda’s cousin “Ryan” (same age) is known to be a troublemaker and had been playing in the vicinity of where the cake was. The blame fell on him (he denied being responsible), and he ended up getting punished. A couple of weeks later, Amanda accidentally let slip to her brother that she was t