ST. JACOBS, ON

Disregarding centuries of Mennonite tradition, the small Anabaptist town of St. Jacobs, Ontario just passed a law banning the wearing of socks with sandals. The new legislation sent shockwaves across the Mennonite community.

“For too long we’ve let socks and sandals cohabitate on the feet of middle-aged Mennonite men,” said local elder Heinrich Brubacher. “It’s gone on long enough. From now on, you have a choice: sandals and bare feet or socks with rubber boots.”

The new law came into effect after a complaint was made by the Mennonite women in town.

“Our husbands have absolutely no fashion sense whatsoever,” said Mrs. Wenger. “If our constant nagging couldn’t convince our husbands to wear some proper footwear, then we had no choice but to get the elders involved.”

The i

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