Dear Annie: I’ve been friends with “Lena” since college, and we’ve always had a close, supportive relationship. But lately, I’ve noticed a pattern that’s starting to wear on me. Every time something good happens in my life -- a promotion, a trip, even small wins -- she either downplays it or changes the subject back to her own struggles.

I know she’s been going through a tough time with her job and her mental health, and I’ve tried to be a good listener. But I’m starting to feel like there’s no room for my joy around her. I’ve pulled back a bit, and now she’s asking why I’m being distant. I don’t want to hurt her, but I also don’t feel like I can keep shrinking myself to protect her feelings.

How do I bring this up in a way that’s honest but kind? And what if she can’t handle hearing it

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