ROSEMONT, IL - The NCAA today charged the entire Big Ten Football Conference with a massive 70-yard delay of game penalty. The penalty comes after the conference delayed play for seven whole weeks.

"It states it clearly in the rulebook right here," explained veteran referee Don Kinney as he pointed at the dusty rulebook. "'Any team, or group of teams, that sort of just stands around and does nothing for a month or two because they're a bunch of sissies who are afraid of getting sick will be charged a 5-yard delay of game penalty', just like in any normal game. In this case, we have the entire conference accumulating this massive, very embarrassing, 70-yard penalty."

There are six games on the Big Ten schedule Saturday, including matchups between Michigan and Minnesota, which should be a

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