In 2020, HGTV star Jen Hatmaker and ex-husband Brandon Hatmaker made headlines for their split, which came alongside accusations that he had been having an affair. Now, five years later, Jen has dove into the cheating allegations in her memoir, Awake, while Brandon has broken his silence on the scandal, admitting that he had been unfaithful to Jen in the “lowest moment” in his life.

In Awake — out September 23 — Jen recalled waking up at 2 a.m. in July 2020 to hear Brandon whispering on the phone with someone else.

“I just can’t quit you,” she heard him say before he fell asleep, according to The New York Post.

Jen described the moment as “the end of my life as I [knew] it.”

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“To some degree, I almost disassociated,” she told the

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