WASHINGTON, D.C. — Following an extensive investigation, U.S. Attorney General Pam Bondi held a press conference to announce that the Department of Justice had officially confirmed that Greedo shot first.

Despite theories abounding that smuggler Han Solo had fired the first shot in an incident that occurred in a Mos Eisley cantina on Tatooine years ago, Bondi stated that all available evidence pointed to Greedo shooting first before he was gunned down.

"We have concluded that there is no evidence that Han Solo shot first," Bondi told reporters. "After reviewing all documentation, this department has officially closed the investigation and can move on now that the case has been solved. We thank everyone for their patience in this matter."

Conspiracy theorists across social media immediat

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