In surprising celebrity news, Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban have called it quits after nearly two decades of marriage. The separation sparked a wave of speculation about what led to their split . After 20 years together and two teenage daughters, fans naturally have questions—but according to insiders, the star of The Hours is handling the heartbreak with calm and grace, but had one major dread.

The Best Actress Oscar winner filed for divorce in Nashville on September 30, one day after reports surfaced that she and Urban had separated earlier in the summer. The Big Little Lies star was reportedly “stressed” about the impending media attention surrounding her marriage’s end, and an unnamed source told People that Kidman had been bracing for the moment the news broke

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