CYBERSPACE — The most advanced Artificial Intelligence on the planet was declared an illiterate moron Monday after viewing CNN for just three hours, say sources. Experts believe the A.I., which scours the Internet for information, could not escape the black hole of idiocy that is CNN's content.

Puny humans on the A.I. development team first became aware of a problem when the software began speaking illogically about a variety of topics, much like CNN's Jim Acosta.

"Computers aren't like us; they reason logically," said chief programmer Darren Von Braunstein. "So when it started saying things like 'Biden is a kindly grandpa and is in no way corrupt,' and 'democracy was almost murdered to death on Jan 6,' we knew something was wrong."

Programmers examined the A.I.'s logs and discovered al

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