SAN FRANCISCO - The National Guard has been called to California's Golden City to neutralize a 600-foot-tall Katie Porter, who is apparently rampaging her way through San Francisco.
Porter, a frontrunner in California's gubernatorial race, reportedly began roaring and growing to an unusual size after a reporter asked her a question.
"You didn't ask her a question, did you? Oh no! She hates that!" cried Mayor Daniel Lurie as the hulking monstrosity smashed a giant hole in the the Transatlantic tower. "There's no stopping her now! Run! Run for your lives!"
"BLLAAAAWWWRRRGGHHHHH!" responded Porter before swallowing a cable car. "KATIE MAAAD! KATIE SMAAAAASH!"
Sources say the problems began a few days ago, when a journalist asked her a question about how she planned to win over voters. Por