Key points

Unfinished or unresolved relationships linger in memory, intensifying feelings of “what if.”

When nostalgia and memory bias rewrite history, the one who got away starts to look perfect.

Idealizing the past can keep you stuck; seeing it clearly helps you move forward.

Does anyone haunt us more than the one who got away?

You know who I mean: that one ex who haunts your thoughts with “what if?”

They’re the ex who pops up in your head when you hear a nostalgic song, or when you run across their name, or when you’re a few drinks in, feeling sorry for yourself.

Let’s be real: most of us have a soft spot for the life we didn’t live. That sharp little ache of almost.

We crave the version of our life where we made the bolder choice. We are, collectively and individually, haunted

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