WASHINGTON, DC

American universities will be shuttering their doors this week as people flock to much more reliable sources of knowledge: random crap found on the Internet. Rather than being educated by qualified experts in their fields, the American public has decided it was best if everyone just got all their information from YouTube and memes.

“They’re all biased, those universities,” said local YouTube educated man Mr. Kehler. “But you know what’s no biased? Some YouTuber I found who happens to confirm everything I already think … plus implants a few new conspiracy theories on the way.”

Kehler is happy with the new university closure saying it was better to have no doctors, artists, and engineers at all, rather than have well-informed and highly educated ones.

“All that education d

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