WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump announced the details of a historic trade deal with Japan on Wednesday through which he has finally acquired a giant anime sword.

"Look at this sword, isn't it great?" Trump said at a presser in which the deal was announced. "It's bigger than my entire body. I could stab the whole world with this thing, believe me."

The giant anime sword, reportedly inspired by Cloud's Buster Sword from Final Fantasy VII , is reportedly 7 feet long and 3 feet wide. Its hilt, made from the bones of Emperor Hirohito, is engraved with the image of a snarling dragon with Trump hair and wrapped in leather using a samurai technique called Tsukamaki.

According to Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent, Japan was willing to drop all tariffs and completely open their market to the

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