Iadmit: Never in a million years could I put the “butch” in “butcher.”

But there is something more authentic, potentially fulfilling and maybe even fun about going full Pilgrim and throwing yourself into Thanksgiving preparations in one of the most old-school ways possible. Who needs a Butterball when you can actually have a ball by prepping your holiday bird from scratch?

Still, when I agreed to a one-on-one turkey-butchering demonstration by the Thanksgiving-forward foodies at Leland Eating and Drinking House in Brooklyn — I was unexpectedly served a heaping side of horror.

“We have an apron for you, and wear non-slip shoes or sneakers of some sort,” the restaurant’s rep warned me in an email.

What in the blood-splattered depths of Freddy Krueger’s “A Nightmare on Elm Street” was I g

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