Schenectady Widow, 100, On WWII Love Story She Never Saw Coming

By Michael Mashburn From Daily Voice

It's the love story that almost wasn't.

At 100 years old, Antoinette “Toni” Cilberti still carries her late husband’s memory with her — especially on Veterans Day, when she's reminded of the wartime letter that started it all.

But growing up in Schenectady, Toni didn’t just not like Nicholas Cilberti — she actively tried to avoid him.

“His sister Carmel was my best girlfriend, and we lived like maybe two blocks away from each other,” Toni told Daily Voice. “But then when I got into like the senior years, oh my God, he was in his terrible teens… They would get together on the corner and chase the girls as they went by.”

“It got so bad,” she added, “that I would call Carmel… and I would say, ‘Is Nick at home?’ She’d say yes, and I’d say, ‘Well, I’m not coming.’”

Nothing in those early years hinted they’d spend more than five decades together — raising two daughters, building a life, and becoming each other’s forever — until World War II intervened.

The Pen-Pal She Never Wanted To Write

When Toni’s brother began dating Carmel, the families grew closer. And when Nick was drafted into the Air Force, Carmel asked Toni for a favor.

“One day she came to me and said, ‘Why don’t you write to my brother?’ And I said, ‘Come on, you know we don’t like each other.’”

That’s when Carmel delivered the threat that changed everything: “Well, if you don’t write to my brother, I’m not going to write to your brother anymore.”

“Yeah, I was really coerced into writing to him," she laughed. She let his first letter sit for a month before responding — but once she did, everything shifted.

“He began rhyming and his letters were so good, so outgoing… I began to look forward to receiving them,” she said. “The letters turned out to be so interesting, all about his experiences overseas. And that’s how this started… we started a relationship as pen pals.”

A First Date She Dreaded

Before shipping out, Nick wrote to say he hoped they could go on a date while he was home on furlough.

“I worried… writing letters is one thing, but going on a date with somebody you really didn’t care for, that’s another thing,” she said.

But Carmel pushed again — and Toni agreed. “And you know, I had such a good time, I couldn’t believe it,” she said. “Growing up a few years older… being in the service, he sure learned a lot, because he was a perfect gentleman.”

Missing For 29 Days

Nick rarely spoke of what happened next, but Toni preserved every detail he shared.

“Imagine the plane being shot down the day before Japan surrendered,” she said. “So when they crash-landed in this uncharted island in the Philippines, they had no idea that the war was over.”

The jungle’s dense foliage cushioned the impact. “One had a broken arm… they were all banged up and bruised.”

They faced days of brutal survival. “They had no food, no water… They were taught how to drink water — but to watch to see if an animal drank it first,” she said. “So they found a baby monkey and threw it in the water to see if he would drink.”

Hand-to-hand combat followed when four Japanese soldiers discovered them. “They couldn’t use their pistols because they were full of sand… It was hand-to-hand combat. Each one of them killed one.”

Friendly islanders helped the survivors hide and escape. “They laid low during the day and traveled at night… island by island.”

On the 29th day, Nick made it back to base. “On the 30th day his name would have gone to Washington, DC as missing in action,” Toni said. “His parents would have gotten a telegram saying they were missing in action.” Nick never spoke about the trauma again.

“In a letter he wrote his parents… he said there’s more I could tell you, but I’m going to stop here — it’s all behind me now and I don’t ever want to discuss it again.”

A Wedding Dress Made From His Parachute

When Nick returned home, he brought the parachute that saved his life. Toni’s mother-in-law and friends gathered to transform it into a wedding gown.

“We all sat around in the living room… each one of us took a panel and stitch by stitch we took the panels apart,” she recalled. “I can still see that — it is so vivid in my mind.”

The gown was handcrafted entirely without a pattern. “She made my gown, cut it, sewed it, sized it and fitted it to me without a pattern,” Toni said. “Oh my God, it’s beautiful. Everything is from the parachute.”

The neckline’s braided cord came from the parachute shroud lines. The hem was reinforced with its fabric. “The day I wore it,” Toni said, “I was just so proud of that gown. I remember thinking, ‘nobody has a gown like this ever.’”

Preserved For Generations

Nearly eight decades later, Toni opened the long-sealed box. “I was shocked to see how beautiful it looked — the same as when I put it away.”

A friend suggested she send it to the National WWII Museum in New Orleans. “Within a day or two I received an email. They were so thrilled. They had nothing like it.”

Toni recalled being "flabbergasted" when she finally traveled to the see the exhibit. “There it is in this beautiful glass showcase with a big spotlight on it. I finally found a safe haven for my gown. Imagine — that’s going to be there forever.”

A Life Built Together

Toni describes her marriage to Nick as joyful, social, and full of movement. “My husband was very active in the Masons and Shriners… every weekend we had a social function or two to go to.”

“We danced throughout the dinner,” she remembered. They traveled constantly early on. “My husband would pick me up on a Friday and we’d travel… For seven years we traveled.”

Later came home and family. “We have two daughters… my youngest daughter and I live together now.”

Toni spent more than 40 years working as a secretary of purchasing for General Electric in Schenectady. She learned early computer systems on her own time and was eventually trusted to draft correspondence and even sign on her boss’s behalf — “which I was very proud of,” she said. GE rehired her after she returned from raising her daughters. She retired in 1987.

By the early 1990s, the quiet toll of Nick’s war injuries was becoming clearer. He’d hurt his hip in the crash landing but never reported it, telling Toni, “If I told them, they’d release me from the hospital.” So he kept it to himself, and favored that hip for the rest of his life.

Nick died in 1992 at age 69 from complications of late-stage Lyme disease. Toni said doctors didn’t recognize the illness for years, mistaking his symptoms for the flu until it had already reached the stage where it began attacking his organs. She believes the disease — and the way it ultimately spread — may trace back to his service, the environments he endured, and that long-ignored hip injury.

“He had it so severe that when they did find out, he was in the third stage," she said. "Stage three is when it began to attack your vital organs.”

A Life Still in Motion

In the decades since, Toni has stayed remarkably active — still hitting the gym, driving her red sports car, competing in New York’s Senior Olympics, and trading emails with friends.

And always, dancing. While she never remarried, Toni found ballroom partner after ballroom partner to help fill the space Nick left — five in all, each of whom she eventually outlived.

“This last person, I danced with him for about 15 years. He was such a good dancer, and he always used to say, ‘You’re the only person that could ever follow me,’” she said. “After he died, I haven’t really ballroom danced for about five years now. At age 100, it’s hard to find anybody.”

Advice For Young Couples

Asked what advice she'd give young couples starting their own relationships, Toni didn’t pause. “I just advise everybody to have an aim, a goal in mind,” she said. “Keep something in the back of your mind and work toward that goal.”

“Most of all,” she said, “I like to see people respect each other. Respect the other person, keep their feelings in mind. Be kind and thoughtful."

Editor's Note: This is part of a series on centenarians that Daily Voice is doing. Follow for more exclusive interviews with centenarians, and if you have a centenarian in your life who wants to share their tips, email mmashburn@dailyvoice.com.

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