DEAR ABBY: I’m 19. My father’s mother has never been a grandmother figure in my life. No healthy relationship was ever formed.

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My dad says it was her fault, but she accepts close to zero responsibility for the situation. She has implied that the fault lies with my mother.

I recently, by accident, referred to her by her first name, and my aunt (Dad’s sister) thought it was disrespectful. How can I politely make her understand that I wasn’t being disrespectful because there is no relationship?

I don’t think anyone sees this from my point of view. There’s an overwhelming consensus that I need to forgive and forget because she is technically my grandmother. I don’t share this feeling. Any thoughts?

— TECHNICALLY THE GRANDDAUGHTER

DEAR GRANDDAUGHTER: You do not have to fo

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