WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Joe Biden quietly withdrew Whoopi Goldberg's Supreme Court nomination after she downplayed the murder of six million Jews. Goldberg would have made history as the first Black Female Justice™.

"Ugh, she would have been perfect," said Biden, snapping his fingers in frustration. "I love Sister Act."

According to sources, Biden is now scrambling to find another Black woman who can appeal to liberals and Trekkies as well as Goldberg can.

"I'm not losing the Trekkie vote!" Biden screamed at a passing intern.

VP Kamala Harris, who hasn't even won a single Oscar, is rumored to be the next person on Biden's list of "Black People I Know." However, she has categorically denied that Biden is considering her.

"The president wants a competent black woman on the court,"

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