DEAR MISS MANNERS: At several gatherings with friends and family, the food is blessed by holding hands during a prayer -- after I have already washed mine in preparation for eating.

Holding hands defeats the purpose of washing them, but I don’t know how to avoid it during the prayer. Refraining from holding hands, or immediately rewashing right after, might offend the other guests. Any ideas on how to handle this situation?

GENTLE READER: Wash your hands at the time appointed, hold hands during the prayer, and then, when everyone else starts to eat, you may excuse yourself, having waited to go to the bathroom. You will then be able to wash your hands a second time with no one the wiser.

Do not let the subterfuge concern you. Miss Manners knows that it is for a good cause -- just as she

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