In its infinite, benevolent and unmotivated-by-profit wisdom, FIFA has bestowed the highest honor in sports upon “San Francisco.”

Or, to be more accurate, the organization has bestowed it upon a roasting griddle of asphalt next to a mid-sized amusement park in Santa Clara.

Yes, the World Cup is coming to Levi’s Stadium. The greatest sporting spectacle on Earth is descending on the technological capital of the world, bringing with it all the pageantry, passion, and soul-crushing traffic jams on Highway 101 that one can withstand.

Last time the men’s tournament was in the U.S., in 1994, eventual champion Brazil played three games at Stanford Stadium.

This time, however, the World Cup does not appear to be bringing the world’s best teams to the Bay this time around.

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