LINKÖPING, Sweden — An American punk backpacking through Europe reportedly refused to learn simple key phrases for the countries he is visiting, opting instead to just be able to say “Nice shirt, name three songs” in various dialects, confirmed sources.

“Most American tourists disrespect other cultures by expecting everyone to speak English. I’ve taken the time to learn the essentials which involves challenging strangers to justify wearing band merch,” said 23-year-old Connor Morris while sipping an alcohol-free Snaps hoping someone will ask about his Rites of Spring shirt. “I also did research on the local punk scene in every country I am visiting. It is only polite to demand a German girl name a Die Ärzte song that was released before the wall fell in her native tongue.”

Locals have ha

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