Istill remember it to this day. I was sitting in homeroom, bored out of my fucking mind, when I heard my favorite band, Godsmack, on the TV during Channel One. I snapped to attention and was completely enthralled for the next minute. That Navy commercial made me think I’d be flying planes off aircraft carriers while listening to “Awake” if I enlisted, so much so that I dropped out that day to sign up. Little did I know that I’d be in for a rude awakening. Who thought that the Navy makes you do stuff like exercise and shave? It’s total bullshit.

They really should have provided more information in that little clip. Apparently, the Navy is all about hard work, discipline, and respecting authority, and these are definitely not where my skill sets lie. At no point did narrator Keith David men

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