Another thing I find annoying is when people go on about how much they prefer dressing for the cold. Which would be understandable – layering gives the eye something to look at, and is useful for concealing bodily insecurities and such – were it not always delivered in the same self-righteous tone. “But I just need to be cocooned and draped and enveloped in cashmere,” they’ll insist. To which I’m like, “Oh? I had no idea you were so enigmatic and unknowable and precious. I didn’t realise you were a Fabergé egg.” It’s all very mysterious to present yourself this way, of course, but what these people really are is scared: scared of being unable to conjure gravitas without a brown coat, and scared of being seen.

But what I do admire is people who are forward-thinking, and it’s these types wh

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