Dear Eric: I separated from my ex-wife in 2021, and we divorced not long after. We don’t communicate often but when we do, I try to be respectful and decent. Our values no longer aligned and ending a 20-year relationship was the right thing to do.

I try very hard not to be in her business. But she has confided in me a few times that her new partner is abusive. I wouldn’t want any stranger on the street to experience that, so I do the things I can. It’s a tough balance with an ex, and I’ve admittedly been too involved in this. The last time I basically told her she’s way too independent and she needs to get away from this (and provided the domestic abuse hotline, resources, et cetera). I’m always going to be the safe person. But it’s ugly for me to be in this.

Tonight, she told me she kic

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