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Pennsylvania to shut down SEPTA and give everyone a 2026 Toyota Corolla Wally Nunn August 13, 2025 August 12, 2025

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In a rare and inspiring moment of bipartisanship, Governor Josh Shapiro and Republican leaders in the Pennsylvania State Senate have reached a groundbreaking solution to SEPTA’s ongoing funding crisis: shut it down and give every daily rider a 2026 Toyota Corolla.

“After weeks of heated negotiations we have come to the conclusion that we can’t come to a conclusion.” Governor Shapiro announced at a jubilant press conference. “So we decided to think outside the box.

SEPTA’s 2026 budget had requested $2.6 billion in operating and capital funding. One negotiator — rumored to be the onl

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